Building Accountability With ADHD to Promote Healthy Habits

"Well last week I know I told you I was really into art and even purchased some pretty expensive art supplies, but I have moved on. I've made the natural progression, as most do, from art to water polo."

Telling others about your passions and goals in life is important. The mere act of bringing those ideas to life, having the courage to tell someone what you are about this week, month or year is a great thing. It builds healthy accountability, if it is addressed properly.

In a perfect world...

after sharing your latest habit, not only do you want yourself to succeed, others do as well. It is super motivating!

relationships are made stronger, being open with others means they feel comfortable being open with you.

sharing your passions with your friends and family might even open new doors, make you new connections that will allow you to explore your interest even further.

The one big CAVEAT to accountability, whether you have ADHD or not, is NOW there are a few more people to "let down" if that habit, goal or hobby you told them about gets replaced or is left incomplete.

Over the course of the pandemic, I have picked more than a few things up and put them down. I have found new things to pick up and even gone back to stuff I put down earlier last year in the hopes I may be able to pick them up again. Spoiler alert, they were too "heavy".

It got to the point where it became painfully obvious that I was switching things up A LOT, my friends would ask me the "how was that thing going?" and every time I felt I had to try and put together some semblance of an explanation for why I decided to move on. That never went well.

In an effort to stop this from happening, you might have stopped telling people all together about your new habits, passions and hobbies. You might mole over the subject of you and make the conversation about them. You might joke it off, while still feeling some resentment towards it inside.

That is pretty unhealthy for a few reasons. If you can't tell your friends about the fun new hobby or life-hack you are into this week, where do you draw the line, how much are you not telling them. That can be a slippery slope to cutting yourself off from the world.

Accountability is not something that should be avoided, it helps us all stay motivated and succeed! So here are some ways I have found are best to decrease the frequency in which you have that "I am interested in this now" conversation while still setting yourself up with some good ol' fashion accountability.

"I am trying to find my thing!"

If you are already to the point where you feel uncomfortable talking about your new interests with your friends, bring them back up in a new light! Finding that one thing that you are going to stick with is something that everyone wants. It is pretty easy to understand someone talking about a new interest every week if you know their end goal is to find the thing that sticks.

This says "hey friend, so listen, I am going to need you to be happy for me as I search and shuffle through the innumerable different things I start up over the next year, because..."

"I picked up (blank) this week, I think I will see where it goes."

You already know how passionate you are about your new habit or hobby and it has only been three days. You are bursting at the seams with new knowledge and things you want to try and talk about, so you can manage that passion in the words you choose to describe it.

Phrases like, "I am looking into..." "I am enjoying ... so far", work well in managing peoples expectations. They communicate that this activity is being done on a "trial basis".

"I put that on the back burner for now, I really enjoyed it."

It is inevitable that you will move on from one hobby to the next, every one does at some point. Just because you are into something new this week doesn't mean you will never revisit those other hobbies you left behind.

To avoid the passionate rant over why that interest just doesn't give you want you need and justifying why you've moved on, keep your options open and simply set it to the side. It will always be there if you want to go back to it.

Work In Waves

Maybe after only two week of painting, don't show your friend all 42 paintings you've created in the last 42 hours, pick your favorite and figure out why it really is your favorite with your friend.

Experts say it takes about 2 months to get fully into an activity or hobby, so I would make it 3, by that time you should start feeling more comfortable in saying you really really love it!

Remember, accountability is a huge driver of motivation, motivation to pursue your dreams, to go on that run, to final make and carry out some routines. That is why we here at Brili recommend you start by telling someone your close with "hey, I am trying out this routine app, Brili, and want to see where it takes me".

That way, you have someone to check in with, someone to ask, "hey, how was that thing going?".